


Scented Envelopes

by alltherestisdrag



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Accidental meeting, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Presents, F/F, Fluff, Lesbian AU, Mild Sexual Content, Mild Smut, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers, Strap-Ons, Summer Vacation, Wrong Adress AU, mentions of cheating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:00:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25977859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alltherestisdrag/pseuds/alltherestisdrag
Summary: Vanessa is a young woman past full of disappointing relationships, Brooke is an interior designer, living all alone.One day Vanessa decides to send letters to her best, old friend, Yvie, who’s so hard to reach to, because she doesn’t use even a phone, so she starts writing passionately, very personal letters.Everything is perfect, until they gather with their friend group at Yvie and Scarlet’s summer house, and they figure out the letters have been sent to the wrong adress the whole time.Vanessa has to go and get them back.
Relationships: Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo, Scarlet Envy/Yvie Oddly
Comments: 20
Kudos: 39





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [beetlejuije](https://archiveofourown.org/users/beetlejuije/gifts).



> Hey y’all!  
> This is my very first fanfic (at least the first one I’ve gotten some courage to share) and since I’m not a native speaker, my English is not ‘that’ good, there can be some obvious mistakes. But I really loved the plot while writing so I hope you enjoy my fic anyways. I’d love to hear about your thoughts.
> 
> Thank you for taking some time off for my fic, hope you have a good reading. 
> 
> XOXO
> 
> p. s. If you wanna talk to me or give me some fic ideas, hit me up on Tumblr as alltherestisdrag

**_ Dear Yvie, _ **

**_ I’ve been missing you guys a lot lately. Hope you do too, otherwise you deserve a punch on the face when I get back there. _ **

**_ It’s been more than five months, that’s a record for us since high school, and I just wanna hear a couple words from you. How’s the new work going? How are you feeling in that new house with Scarlet? Does she frustrate you? I know relationships are not easy nor fun, so call me (I don’t know how you’re gonna do though) anytime if things go bad. I have good ideas for you, starting with kicking her ass off if she makes you feel sad. _ **

**_ (...) _ **

**_ Please call me or send me a letter back, okay? I have tons of things to say. _ **

**_ Love you, _ **

**_ Your favorite friend, Vanjie _ **

***

Vanessa was incredibly pissed when she’d gotten into her friend’s summer house. Even the woody incense smell wasn’t helping her to relax a little bit because after the flight, she had to walk through a long way around the estate because she’d gotten lost among the huge villas. 

She pulled her suitcase harshly inside and yelled: “Yvie, don’t you dare getting into my side, you ana-chromatic bitch!” She sat on the floor and wiped her sweat off her face with her flowery shirt, betting she was smelling like shit. She needed a shower, but she wasn’t even able to get her ass off the floor. 

“That’s anachronistic.” She lifted her head off her phone screen when she heard the mocky voice coming closer to her. “Welcome, Vanjie. Yvie’s doing yoga over the pool. Let me help you unpacking.” Vanessa was so happy to see Scarlet even if they were not that close, instead of her loud-ass besties, because her head was still cloudy because of the flight, and she had a migraine thing going on. So getting help of a calm girl was all she’s needed at that moment. 

“Oh, hi Scarlet.” She took the helping hand of the taller girl and stood up. She was feeling better. “Tell your old-souled girlfriend that it’s been decades since they’ve found airplanes. So I was waiting for a warm welcome at least.” Scarlet laughed, almost snorting, and made the other girl join her. “Oh my god, I really missed y’all,” Vanessa mumbled between her chuckles.

It had been the longest since they last saw each other since high school, and getting together for the summer vacation was probably the best thing they could ever do.

She was clearly remembering the times they were strutting at school corridors, how they were getting into troubles and fucking their whole peace all week long, how much fun she had being a cheerleader with Yvie... and they’d suddenly parted to different states because of their stupid works. Things were different, they weren’t teenagers anymore, the whole world wasn’t fun and goofiness at all, and the only thing they could keep the same was their intimacy. 

“Are the other dumbies here yet?” She asked, feeling the missing taking over her body. Then she suddenly heard clatters and noises from upstairs, coming through the stairs. Speaking of the devil, she thought. 

“Get off my way, hoe!” She heard a familiar rusty voice and jeered as Scarlet pulls her suitcase to her room upstairs. Vanessa was waiting for her friends to appear with a non-shocked grin, they were always loud and stirring like that. She wasn’t so different than them, though. “Silk if you step on my foot with your sleepy ass one more time!” 

She could finally see the owners of the chaos. A’keria was wearing a hot pink bikini, looking amazing with her wavy hair, but she would swear that Silky had woke up just a minute ago. 

“I knew it,” A’keria said when she saw Vanessa waiting with open arms. “I know that cookie monster voice from everywhere!” Vanessa comforted her bestie in her arms with a thight hug, eyes closing peacefully. “I missed you so much, stupid!” She said, almost crying.

Talking on the phone wasn’t filling meeting in real life’s shoes at all. Kiki caressed her back hardly and pressed their bodies together, making Vanessa relax with the coconut scent oozing from her beautiful dark hair. “Me too,” she mumbled, and pulled Vanessa off to see her better. 

“Tell me another one who could look this gorgeous after a flight,” she said and Vanessa hit her softly with a big grin.

Then Silky pushed them apart, mewed her into her arms. “You tiny ass bitch! Which asshat made you lose this much weight?” Silky would never overlook her, like that moment.

Yeah she’d lost up more than 15 pounds but there wasn’t any person who could affect her romantically, as usual. “She could lose all that weight only with all those long hookups, Silk,” A’keria laughed and made Vanessa scream with shyness. 

They shot the breeze a little bit like that. They were suddenly feeling the warm tune of the old days, Vanessa could easily picture them trying to escape the detention right after they hang  ACAB  brochures ‘all around’ the school walls.

“How dare you start without me!” Suddenly they all turned to the owner of the stiff, familiar voice, and Yvie was standing right there, hands on hips. Vanessa pressed her lips together with a big smile, which made Yvie smirk too. 

“Come here,” she said, and wrapped her arms around the girl running through her. “I’m gonna whoop your ass after we pass this full filling the longing part, just lettin’ you know’” Yvie laughed and hit her back, and put a kiss onto her neck. “It’s been a year and a half, you have to grow up but you look tinier, stupid!” Yvie said, standing with a fake mad face. 

Vanessa knew her busy working schedule and stupid ass boss who had been hitting her were making her forget herself at some points. That’s why she wanted to stay away at least for a couple months and have a good time with her girls.

She shrugged and looked at her friend’s neon green dreadlocks, peeking through her ponytail. “You’ve changed too, looks good on you.” Yvie smiled and thanked agreeably. 

Almost ten minutes went like that, them chatting at the entrance and thing getting more and more goofier with Scarlet joining her. Vanessa’s legs couldn’t take it anymore. “Anyone cares inviting me in?” She asked and made the girls suddenly realise what were they doing. 

“I put your suitcase and placed the garments,” Scarlet said. “You didn’t have to bring that many toys though, there are very beautiful women in this neighborhood.” Vanessa’s eyes opened wide with shock, suddenly remembering how shameless Scarlet could be about sex life, and both Yvie and her screamed her name at the same time.

“You better go get one of them then,” Yvie said jealously, knitting her eyebrows. “I’m going back to yoga, I need to let my nerves relax.” Scarlet ran after the girl turned her way to the pool. “Babe, didn’t say that you’re not one of them!” 

When the voices drew away, they were alone with Silky and A’keria, like they always are on the FaceTime calls. “Did you really brought that many toys?” A’keria shaked her finger at Vanessa, slit-eyed. Well... She wasn’t an extrovert and maybe she could’ve gone too far about trying to bring some relaxing items with her, but she wasn’t gonna tell them about that. 

“Shush, Kiki,” she said. “Bet you tucked your boyfriend into your suitcase, so don’t make me start!” When she whispered angrily, Silky cut their little argument. “This is a girls only trip, you dumbie,” she said. “I would kick his ass off if I would see him here.” 

Vanessa pouted with dissatisfaction and passed both of the girls to go to her room. She wasn’t gonna talk about that and get shy anymore. 

But the ideas stuck her mind stopped her at the middle of her way. “Silk!” She turned back suddenly, hunger and missing of old days taking over her body. “Could you cook for us, please? ‘M starving and I really missed your dinners.” She knew that her friend wouldn’t reject her when she was begging there upstairs, with a puppy face.

***

“I tried to reach you countless times, so don’t you dare to call me disloyal,” Vanessa shouted to Yvie before she stuffs in a mouthful of salad, knife pointing right at her. 

“Well, it seems you did not,” Yvie shrugged and continued getting on Vanessa’s nerves without giving a damn.

Vanessa was pissed, because she knew that she’d tried almost every way to talk to her, but her friend was so against to technology, she had no cellphones nor a fucking TV. “I tried to text you, you have no fucking phone-“

Yvie cut her right after swallowing the last piece of her lasagne. “I do, stupid. I have a land phone. I just don’t have a cellphone because I think it’s time consuming. Not because I’m against technology like you think, thank you very much.” She took a huge sip of her wine and sealed her words.

Vanessa was acting like she didn’t hear no shit because she was still so pissed off about that not being able to communicate thing. “How could I know bitch, you didn’t tell me! Plus I tried to call Scarlet, you were miles away; I even tried to send you fucking letters, you didn’t answe-“

Yvie suddenly choked into her wine with a huge laugh, Scarlet had to pat her back to save her breathe. 

The whole table was in shock with the imagination of Vanessa Vanjie Mateo trying to send letters to someone. Silky joined the laugh after she’s got over the aftershocks, and then A’keria couldn’t keep herself anymore.

“What the fuck?” Vanessa shouted, she was confused and pissed. “I even thought of communicating through birds or smoke signals and shit, so that was my most modern option. Laugh at your own situation, old hoe.”

She chugged all of her glass with her stress levels getting upper and upper, trying to let her muscles relax a little bit. 

When Yvie tried to talk, she stopped her immediately with her hand, but she didn’t listen. She spitted the most confusing words for her instead: “No, seriously, Vanjie. Are you for real?” 

Vanessa gave her a little gaze while pouring a huge glass of wine for herself, handing Scarlet the bottle right after she’s done. She was surprised, because she couldn’t get why the girls were so incredulous about that. Yvie was so hard to reach, so obviously she was gonna try every possible option to chat with her bestie. 

“Yes, stupid. You don’t have to act like you didn’t get them. The girls are not strangers.” 

After Vanessa’s words, the whole table stopped speaking like there was something wrong. Yvie was so confused, almost like trying to remember something. “Wha?” Vanessa asked, still not getting anything. “Don’t tell me you didn’t get them, Yvie. The tracking said they have arrived to the recipient.”

“Of fucking course I did not get them, Vanessa. Why would I mock? Why, did you wrote down anything special?” 

Vanessa felt her body heat turning into a sensible hundred degrees with her heavy anxiety appearing, her mind working quickly to remember every single thing she’s sent. She knew that the letters were long, pages long, maybe too long because she had written most of them down on her laptop and then printed. 

“What the fuck is going on?” Silky said after putting another slice of lasagne onto Vanessa’s plate, trying to calm her down with her delicious food, but it wasn’t working for the first time. 

“I told every single detail going on my life, Yvie. From my hookups, to y’all bitches’, how much of an asshole my boss were with the ‘full fucking name’ of him, what did I change my phone mumber to, address of my new office...” She stopped with a praying look into her eyes. “Every, single, thing. So you better be joking right now.” 

When she compressed every word hardly, the girls knew that she wasn’t enjoying that talk anymore. She was so serious, and the letters were no joke.

“Shit,” Yvie said. “Shit, shit, shit. Tell me you did not, please.”

Those words were enough to explain how fucked up the situation was, and they didn’t know how to fix that at all. Yvie bit her nails as she always does when she gets nervous, because she knew that how honest and even tactless Vanessa could be when she was with her friends. She couldn’t even imagine the things written down those letters. That wasn’t bad just for her, but also for her friends’ privacy too. 

What if they tried to send a feedback, saying that they were gonna exposeeverything if they don’t send them money or something? What if they got into Vanessa’s house and steal all of her stuff because they knew she wasn’t there. What if they stalked her, and what if...

“Yeah, shit.” Vanessa said, eyes immediately filling with tears. 

A’keria knew how messed up she could be when she was nervous and when she didn’t know what to do. Vanessa had always looked so indestructible, however she was quite opposite because of the things she had gotten through. She reached out through the table, holded Vanessa’s arm sincerely to give her some support. 

“Vanjie, just stay calm a little bit, okay? Tell me which adress you sent them to and let’s hope that they’re not in bad hands and we can get them back.” 

Her friends knew her the best, but A’keria was so good at acting the way she needed anytime she gets anxious. She needed someone to comfort her at the times she couldn’t breathe. And while Silky was freaking out with her, A’keria and Yvie were pulling all of their pieces together like a mother, which made her so grateful for. Akeria was mostly taking the upper hand like she does at that moment.

Vanessa pulled her phone off her pocket and opened her notes section, then found the short adress she had messily written. 

When she handed the phone to Yvie, the girl couldn’t help but groan. “It must be 35, Vanessa, not 33!” 

When she shouted at her, Silky suddenly undertook protecting her. “Maybe that’s not her fault that you being the hardest person on earth to reach, Yvie”

The nerves were getting wired with the girls throwing shit to each other, Scarlet needed to interfere after that point. “Maybe y’all should calm down and we should figure the shit out.”

She was definetely right, they were pushing each other because they were so nervous, like dumb little children, and it was not healthy. 

“Do you know who’s living in 33rd villa Scarlet?” Yvie asked, changing the subject into a more sensible one, also praying them to be someone who doesn’t read her mails at all. Even if it was not that possible, the existence of the prospect was making her hold onto that.

“I don’t know about anyone here, Yves. You don’t either. We had to go with a stupid cake or something and meet them, as proper neighbors.” 

She was right. Yvie had been living in the summer house for two years just because she was liking the silence and peacefulness of it, and Scarlet was staying with her most of the time. However they both were not into knowing their neighborhood and she could never imagine that it would be necessary at some point.

“That could be the gay man who’s been walking his dog with his boyfriend, the old lady living alone, or the blonde bitch who did not even condescend to say hi to me once...” 

Yvie was trying to review all the options when Vanessa was trying to figure out what she exactly wrote, also praying them to be the old lady, who probably wouldn’t be able to read her 9 point sized Times New Roman font.

“There are countless blonde bitches and gay men and old ladies living all around here, Yvie,” Scarlet hit her own head with dissatisfaction. “This is not helping.”

Vanessa buried her face onto the table and took a deep breath. She eventually needed to go and see them, plus get the courage to say she was stupid enough to send the most private letters to a wrong adress, so could she please take them back. 

“Seems like you gotta visit them Vanj,” Silky said and lanced the boil like they all didn’t know. Of course there wasn’t anything else she could do because their friends had no idea about who were living around the area, nor what kind of people were they.

“Okay,” she hummed quietly and lifted her head up, decked out with teary eyes. “‘M gonna see them tomorrow. Cook me one of your delicious pies, Kiki. I’ll need a warm introduction.”

***

Vanessa put the pie onto the desk for a moment and fixed her dress a little bit. “Do I look decent?” She asked to the girls watching her carefully. 

She thought she was looking cute in her flowery baby blue dress and little matching butterfly hairclips attached to her straight hair, but she was probably looking like she was about to give birth to twins or shit in any moment because of pressure.

“You look cute,” Silky said. “Don’t make it such a big deal Vanj. You’re not gonna find yourself a partner or shit. Just act kind, get those letters and come back, that’s all.” 

Vanessa rolled her eyes and flipped her honey bubble hair off her shoulders. Of course, it was easy to say but hard to do, because she wasn’t the one who’s gonna stand against the stranger who stupidly knows almost everything about her.

“Call me if anything goes wrong,” Yvie said. “I mean, call the land line.” 

Vanessa cussed internally to her friend being so hard to reach to, otherwise she wouldn’t be doing this. But at the end of the day whatever happened had happened, and she just needed to fix the situation and come back home, her comfy bed after that.

“I will, I’m out!” She said, fixed her baguette bag, grasped the warm apple pie and immediately left the house, otherwise she wouldn’t have get the courage to do so.

33rd villa was so close, she just had to cross the road and pass one house, and she was there, as Scarlet said. But the road was getting longer and longer in her eyes, she almost felt her feet couldn’t carry her anymore.

She didn’t know why she was making it such a big deal inside but she was just feeling so exposed, almost like naked. And she’d never liked being naked in front of someone that she doesn’t know at all.

The thoughts kept attacking to her mind, but her feet was still poorly working. And then she was suddenly there, even if she didn’t want to at all.

When she pressed the doorbell softly, her hands were all shaky and sweaty. She hated that, she hated that a lot. 

She waited like that for like a minute, teeth torturing her glossy lips by biting, but nobody answered. She was hoping that they weren’t staying at that house, and she’s been getting nervous about that distemperately. 

Maybe she could even sneak into their mailbox and get her letters without getting into an embarrassing conversation. 

But she internally knew that the jeep parked in front of the house had a owner living inside this house.

She patiently raised her hand once more to knock this time, and promised that it was going to be her last try, but her hand hung in the air when the door suddenly opened.

There was a blondie, probably one of the girls Scarlet’s mentioned because how incredibly beautiful she was, pool water dripping from all over her to the wooden floor, a thin towel clumsily wrapped around her milk white body. She was beautiful, so beautiful with her wet hair slicked back slightly.

“Hello,” the most beautiful voice she had ever heard said, “How can I help you?”

Well, maybe she would want to be naked in front of  that stranger.


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vanessa finally gets to meet the curious receiver of the letters. Apparently, they are more than a stranger and a reckless neighbor.

**_Dear Yvie,_ **

**_ I’ve been writing you for six fucking months and I’ve gotten no answers since then. I think you just ignore me because you think shipping methods are so technologic or something? _ **

**_ Just kidding. _ **

**_ But really, my next step is gonna be communicating through smoke signals, so you better text me back.  _ **

**_ I really need you guys so much. Don’t wanna ruin your mood, but I’m literally fucked. Things are going so shitty lately. I don’t know if I can do this anymore with these people around me, Yves. I’m about to leave everything behind and move into a chalet or something, bet wolves would take care of me better. _ **

**_ I just found out that Kameron was sleeping with another girl, so there’s literally nobody left who could cheer me up. We ended before we started, as always. _ **

**_ I said love was not for me before, but it had never gotten so real. _ **

**_ (...) _ **

**_ Please call me, I need your advices.  _ **

**_ Love you and miss you loads, _ **

**_ Vanjie _ **

*** 

“Hello,” the most beautiful voice she had ever heard said, “How can I help you?”

Vanessa didn’t know that she waited that long until the woman in front of her repeated her sentence with a worried face. She gulped hardly and suddenly handed her the apple pie because her mind was so cloudy, which made the other woman drop the towel wrapped around her to catch the dessert.

“Sorry,” Vanessa quickly said when the blonde stayed just with her red bikinis. “I’m Vanessa. I’ll be staying over at my friend Yvie for this summer and just thought- thought that meeting might be cool.” 

The blonde woman let out a little chuckle against her almost memorized sounding introduction, and opened the door wider with relief. “Vanessa? Vanessa Vanjie Mateo?” She asked with a surprised face, trying to be sure.

Of course she was wise too. She had definitely read all the letters, Vanessa thought. Being disgraced against a woman who was looking so flawless and strong was definitely annoying for her. She wished she’d at least kept all those hookups for herself.

She nodded ashamedly and shrugged right after hearing the woman’s questioning voice.“I think you know me enough.”

“Yeah,” the blondie said with a huge grin, which made Vanessa relax a little bit because she didn’t look like a pure evil at all, most likely an angel flung out of space, “Come in, we have a lot of things to talk.”

Vanessa accepted her invitation and stepped into the house, mostly decorated with white and black tones, right opposite of the Yvie’s. A strong but soothing coffee smell was having the house in it’s hands and it was so invitatory, so familiar, almost made Vanessa feel like she had been there before.

“I have fresh coffee,” the woman said, slowly looking over her shoulder to Vanessa, who didn’t know where to sit or what to do. “Want some?”

Vanessa could never resist some good coffee, so she nodded, and laid her back onto the counter of the kitchen while the woman, who still didn’t deign her name, was filling the coffee into two beautiful mugs. 

“And you?” She asked curiously, like knowing her name would fix all of her problems.

“Oh, sorry!” She said and handed Vanessa the warmed cup. “I’m Brooke, Brooke Lynn Hytes. I felt like we’ve met before, so it completely got out of my mind.”

Vanessa was thinking how impossible it was for her to forget a beautiful name and a face like this once they met, but she couldn’t say it out loud, still trying to check the pulse.

Now she was wondering which parts of the letters she couldn’t forget and hated, why didn’t she text her back to say the address was wrong, and if she was gonna expose all of her feelings on a daily magazine page or shit.

Vanessa took a huge sip from her coffee, trying to relax a little bit with the caffeine proceeding inside her body. 

She was suddenly feeling lucky, lucky to meet someone like her instead of a sly old fox, trying to hit her with all of her secrets. Because Brooke wasn’t making her feel like they were completely strangers, she was acting so candid instead, probably to make her feel better.

“Well,” Brooke said and sat onto the kitchen counter, took a little sip of her coffee, leaving a wet trace behind her. “I didn’t think that we could meet at some point, but here we go.”

Normally, Vanessa would be wishing they’ve never met, but the kindness infesting from the blonde woman was only making her smile. Making her want to get to know her better.

“Me neither,” Vanessa sneered. “I was so sure about the adress, but I gave the wrong house number all the time.” She stopped and turned her gaze into blonde’s eyes, hands wrapped around the mug. “Why didn’t you text me back and tell me the adress was wrong? You had my phone number and everything. You know that you could.”

Brooke froze, she wasn’t ready for that question. She took one more big sip and straightened up on the counter while it was burning all her gullet. She didn’t want to sound like a psycho or something.

“I- I thought that was kinda fun, you know.” She shrugged. “When I get the first letter, I was this close to resend it.” She showed a little amount with her long fingers. “Because you know... You were so pissed and honest and everything and... it wasn’t for me.” 

Vanessa gulped with the sincerity oozing from Brooke’s voice, and pulled her back off the counter, trying to see her expressions better. Brooke clearly was remembering all the unnecessary things about her, she could see that in her face.

“Then it changed. Like... I’m living alone and during all that shitty working schedule, waiting for a long strange letter was starting to get exciting. I-“ she cut herself by bringing the cup into her mouth and washed her throat with some liquid. “I suddenly found myself wanting to get more from you. Sorry if that sounds freaky or stupid-“

Vanessa was shocked, completely shocked and speechless. When she had left the house to get the letters, she wasn’t expecting this to happen, but now, the most beautiful woman she’d seen was saying that she enjoyed getting her stupid letters, and she wasn’t trying to expose her or anything. That was like a miracle for Vanessa’s anxious brain.

“No, Jesus” she rubbed her eyes slowly and tried to figure out what could she say, “I just- it was my mistake, not yours. I was just so panicked because I didn’t know where did they go. I tend to be apprehensive about unknown things...”

They didn’t say anything for a while, but Vanessa had to turn back to her when the other woman got down from the counter and walked towards the hall. 

She was keeping her eyes off Brooke’s beautiful ass hardly when she leaned to take the letters from the newspaper rack, trying to focus on the black and white marbles on the floor instead.

“Here they are,” Brooke threw them onto the counter and strached her wet hair slightly. “I was actually gonna text you back after I get this one,” she raised the one with the pink heart patterned envelope. 

Vanessa knew that that was not one of the most positive ones on the contrary with the envelope, because she was getting through an hard phrase, she was so alone and incredibly fucked, her boss was trying to find a proper moment to hit on her as always, the whole business situation was fucked, her last relationship had ended in the most frustrating way it could possibly happen... So the whole letter was quickly handwritten and probably gotten wet with her tears. She was remembering putting their old pictures from the summer camp and crying over how badly she misses them, how badly she needed someone to comfort her at that moment. So she knew that why Brooke wanted to respond her. 

She felt like she could be someone to calm her down, how surprised she would feel if she’d get a letter from a stranger. But she’d probably quit sending them, she’d thought. Or would she?

“Is everything okay now?” She asked with the softest tone Vanessa’s ever heard, and made her heart stutter. “I was honestly so crushed when I get this after the most goofy and funny letters from you. I’m so sorry I couldn’t give these to Yvie, -Yvie right?- at that time, I didn’t know that she was living around here.”

Vanessa gave her a faint smile, fingers tracing around the brim of the cup, trying to put her thoughts into an order.

Brooke was definitely the kindest owner who could’ve get her stupidly detailed letters, so she wasn’t afraid anymore. But it was still making her feel strange to stay so in the raw in front of her. She didn’t know anything about her after all.

“‘M better,” she said. “Sorry if I fuc-“ she suddenly shut herself up to not to cuss, but Brooke shaked her hand to show that it was okay. “I- sorry if I destroyed your mood with that one. I just needed to explode. I wasn’t even planning to send it. It just happened.” 

Vanessa really did come through that hard phrase, feeling much better about herself lately. She’d fixed their business issues, loneliness and already forgotten her filthy ass flirt, so she was doing much better.

“What about your stupid boss?” Brooke suddenly asked, and Vanessa had to check herself to figure out if Brooke was reading her mind or something. She gulped, and shrugged. It wasn’t the strangest thing after two years of working with a douchebag. Money was good, and Vanessa promised she wasn’t gonna complain anymore after the solid raise she’s gotten lately.

“Nothing changed,” Vanessa bit her lower lips. “He keeps paying compliments, giving me flowers or shit, he even tried to-“ She closed her eyes hardly when she remembered the time he asked her for a date night, which didn’t sound innocent at all. “You know, forget it. I don’t wanna talk your head off. You’ve experienced too much of it already.”

Brooke hit her mug hardly onto the counter and made Vanessa open her eyes again, a confused expression showing on her face. “Your problems don’t bother me, Vanessa,” she said, and left Vanessa in shock.

“If they did, I would quit reading all of these letters. I just wanted to help you at some points but I was such a pussy when it came to responding. I have plenty of half-written letters laying down all around the house. I can give them to you at some point but-“ 

Vanessa’s eyes were filled with tears already, Brooke had to cut het words. It was unusual for Vanessa. Someone who didn’t really know her was taking care of her internally so well, she suddenly felt so valuable. 

“Wish you did,” she said. “Thank you for not threatening me or something... I- I was so prepared for the worst situation so this is like finding the gold for me.”

Brooke laughed. “So I am the gold, huh?” Which made Vanessa froze with her lips opened slightly. She fixed the situation right after that. “Joking, relax. It’s okay. I’m not that kind of person, I know when I see a good person, and I don’t do bad to them.”

Vanessa exhaled with relief and took the last sip of her coffee, letting her muscles relax a little bit more. Brooke was literally the gold she’s been digging through for, otherwise she would be so fucked. 

“Thank you,” she said again. “Sorry I interrupted your pool time.”

Brooke shrugged and smiled, she was almost completely dry, fingers slightly sweeping through the letter stack. 

“It’s completely okay. You can join me whenever you want. It was so nice to meet you.” 

Vanessa knew that they were coming to the end of the speech, but she didn’t want it to end at all. She enjoyed talking to her, enjoyed it so stupidly much, she was almost gonna beg her to let her stay with her. 

Brooke suddenly asked like she felt what she was thinking her again, didn’t even let Vanessa thank again for her kindness. But the words weren’t the best ones she’s heard from her so far. 

“Do you still see that girl... what was her name? Kameron, yeah, Kameron.” 

Vanessa felt her cheeks getting red with frustration. “No,” she slurred over. “I’m not seeing anyone after her. It’s just... an unnecessary stress source for me. It wasn’t meant to happen at all.” She didn’t want to dig the past anymore because she was already hurt so badly, kinda disappointed because Brooke’s unexpectedly inconsiderate about twisting the knife over her.

“I’m sorry,” Brooke said. “I was being witless. It’s just been a long time since you’ve last written and-“

Vanessa cut her by leaving the cup onto the counter and dangled onto the strap of her bag. “It’s okay,” she said. “I better leave.”

She wasn’t offended even if she sounded like that though, they didn’t know each other at the end. So she just needed to process all the things happened all of a sudden, how stupidly good Brooke made her feel with her every word caressing her ears.

“Another coffee, or maybe some pie?” Brooke asked desperately, almost begging for her to stay as Vanessa needed, but her body was slightly shaking with the caffeine already, maybe with confusion. So she wanted to run into their pool and have some cold water onto her skin immediately. 

“Thanks,” Vanessa mumbled. “It was good. Hope you enjoy the pie.” 

Brooke didn’t say anything but nodded, speeding her to the front door with silence. “You don’t want the letters?” She asked in suspense after Vanessa stood up at the exit.

Vanessa gave herself a moment to think about that, but they didn’t mean anything much after she’s met Brooke and saw how harmless and kind she was, she thought they could stay. Now she could see that how unnecessarily they’d all panicked, and how safe everybody were. “No,” she said. “You can keep ‘em. Just don’t show them to anyone else.”

Brooke smiled and laid her shoulder to the door wing, watching Vanessa trying to put her empty hands in a place. “Your secrets are safe with me, ma’am.” Brooke said with a playful voice, hands tied on her breast.

Vanessa gave her one last gaze, and turned back, almost running through their own house. She had to look back to the blondie, standing there with her amazing bikinis and at the same position though.

“Use a fake engagement ring,” Brooke shouted. “To make sure that the asshole won’t be disturbing you anymore!”

***

Vanessa pushed herself deeper into the cold water, getting the help of the pool’s corners. She was feeling much more relaxed when she felt the water pressuring down her skin, feet touching the slippery floor. 

Girls’ voices were so wuthering and faint when she was in there, she wanted to stay longer, longer, until she run the oxygen in her lungs short.

“For fuck’s sake, Vanessa!” She heard Silky’sscream, and there she was again, in the middle of the chaos she internally loved. 

“I thought you drowned, stupid. I was about to jump in there with my clothes and I ain’t know swimming properly!”

Vanessa laughed and wiped her face with her wet hands, slicking her long hair back off her head. “‘M okay, silk. Did anything happen?”

She wished there was nothing wrong, because after 3 days with her non-stoppable period, she was finally able to use the pool as much as she wanted, and a mess was the latest thing she wanted to come across with.

“That blonde hoe,” Silky said, and suddenly caught Vanessa’s attention. “She brought you something. Here.”

Silky dropped the little box in front of Vanessa, and left her alone without saying anything else. Luckily she wasn’t the one who were so curious about her social life.

Vanessa suddenly got so nervous and excited, she had to pinch herself under the water to come into the real life.

“What’s it gonna be...” she took the cartoon box with shaky hands and tried to open but her hands were so wet and slippery, she had to shake them hardly to dry a little bit. 

It had been three days since she saw her the last and first time, and she was almost like suddenly disappeared.

Vanessa was sometimes spying her out of her room window upstairs, but she was like stuck or dead at home, not even appearing behind the curtains once. The only reason Vanessa knew that she was alive was that the lights she turns on at nights, and that was all.

She didn’t know why she was so into seeing her though, and that was making her even more frustrated with the times she cannot.

She opened the box slowly, and saw a glazed, -probably handmade because it was warm and smelling so good- lemon muffin, which was Vanessa’s absolute favorite. 

She knew it, of course she did because she couldn’t stop praising the amazing lemony smell of the last envelope she’s sent on the letter, and Brooke was wise enough to get it.

Vanessa smiled when she found a little note, and pulled herself to the corner of the pool to not splash any water onto them. 

**_ The childhood pics you’ve sent three months ago were quite funny, here’s the payback. Hope you like the muffin. They’re handmade.  _ **

**_ XOXO _ **

**_ Brooke _ **

**_ p.s. You dropped your charm bracelet here, I’m keeping that for you _ **

Vanessa couldn’t keep her chuckle, hand covered her mouth to hide it. She wasn’t waiting for a step from her like this, so she was quite surprised.

Vanessa was a grown ass lesbian woman, and she gets when they’re interested, and when the things are just friendly. 

She didn’t send her bracelet with the muffin, which means she wanted to see her again.

“Oh my god,” she mumbled and let out a laugh when she suddenly saw the childhood picture stuck under the muffin. There was probably little, little Brooke with a much lighter hair color, sitting on a feeding chair, whole body and face covered with chocolate cake. Vanessa loved children, and that picture only was enough to made her heart melt in a moment.

She suddenly got interrupted while looking at the picture carefully, with her friends’ voice getting louder and louder.

“I knew it!” she heard A’keria running through her. “We call that destiny, bitch!” She suddenly jumped into the pool and stole the note from Vanessa.

“Stop,” she shouted. “You’re gonna soak it, Kiki!” But her friend was so busy with reading the note out loud, putting a huge kissing sound at the end.

When all the girls got into the pool, mocking and pushing each other, Vanessa knew that her ‘sitting around the pool and eating her muffin’ plans were drowned deep, and the girls were not going to shut up about their little ‘situation’ even for a moment.

“Did she really send you a muffin and a note like they did in the old days?” Yvie climbed over Vanessa’s knees, almost making her fall into the pool.

“Coming from the vintage bitch herself,” Vanessa rolled her eyes and pushed Yvie back into the water to save herself.

Yeah, she was quite impressed, yeah, Brooke was so beautiful and kind and everything, yeah, she knew a lot about her already, but was Vanessa ready to get into something like that? Like she had said when she broke up with her last ‘lover’ years ago, right after the college, that was it. She’d never called anyone her girlfriend since then. 

And there was Kameron last year, she thought she was all she needed, they’ve been hanging out together and things were almost getting serious, until she caught her in the bed with another girl. Which made her say never, never again. She wasn’t ready to get another kick on the ass at all.

But her heart wasn’t listening her heavy concerns at all, beating fastly anytime her eyes finds the little note and every bite she takes from the muffin. 

“When you’re gonna go and get the bracelet?” Scarlet asked. “She’s clearly inviting yo-“ her words cut by Yvie pulling her into the water, but Vanessa could catch her last words.

“Well, I won’t,” Vanessa took another bite from the delicious muffin, and told the exact opposite thing that her heart had wanted. “She can wear it if she likes.”

“What the fuck, Vanjie?” A’keria suddenly got out of water and shouted, “That was my gift and it was not cheap shit.” 

Vanessa knew that. 

And she also knew that she wasn’t gonna be able to keep herself away from running through her house, and get that bracelet back. 

As always, she was so embracing against a mess coming closer, she was so familiar to that story arc, and it had never, even once, brought good consequences to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the second Chapter, thank you so much for reading.  
> Any comment is appreciated.  
> You can find me on Tumblr as alltherestisdrag and let me know if you have any requests or if you wanna talk. 
> 
> XOXO
> 
> p. s. This story isn’t based on anything real and didn’t mean to offend anyone. I love and respect every name I’ve used.


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vanessa is feeling more and more confused with the signals coming from Brooke, afraid of being ruined once again.  
> Yvie lends her a helping hand as always, subduing Vanessa’s terrified thoughts.   
> Finally, she’s ready to take a solid step forward.

**_Dear Yvie,_ **

**_ (...) _ **

**_ I watched The Notebook again today, and got sad over my nonexistent love life over again. _ **

**_ Maybe I only deserve a post-it, and that’s all. _ **

**_ Anyway, at least you hoes are happy, aren’t you? How’s everything going with Scarlet? I was worried when she said you were kinda sick last month. _ **

**_ She also said you were gonna call me back but I’ve gotten no calls, so I bet she had forgotten to tell you.  _ **

**_ It’s ok tho. I’m doing much better and I ain’t getting those post-its ever again, don’t worry. _ **

**_ And let me tell you the good news, my boss finally served a purpose, and I’ve gotten a raise! Isn’t it amazing? _ **

**_ We celebrated it with Kiki and Silky, but I wished if you could be there too. _ **

**_ (...) _ **

**_ I miss you, Yves. Please let me know if everything is all right and you’re not sick anymore because I’m starting to get worried. I know how bad your allergies could get during the spring times.  _ **

**_ Wear a mask before going to a walk in the forest so the pollens don’t bother you that much, okay? _ **

**_ Love you and miss you, _ **

**_ Your best friend (reminding in case you forgot) Vanessa Vanjie _ **

***

Vanessa was sitting onto the window corner at her room, which was brightly decorated for Vanessa’a favor with colorful leds and modern white furnitures by Yvie; and sipping her bad smelling herbal tea she had made only for Vanessa again. She’d told that it was gonna make her relax.

Vanessa knew that it was Yvie’s own way to beg herself off by giving her the care she couldn’t during the past year, and she was completely okay with it.

When she saw some liveliness at that specific house’s door during watching the road, she suddenly straightened up and opened the sparkly curtains to see if she was gonna leave the house or she was just checking the street from the glass door. She couldn’t help looking at the door, she didn’t know why, but she just couldn’t as if she was desperate to know what was going on. 

The door had opened after some time, which wasn’t actually expected for Vanessa. Then the blonde woman appeared with the most gorgeous outfit, making Vanessa leap up and spill the warm tea all over her lap.

“Shit,” she whispered, not knowing that if she was surprised for seeing her in that red suit or she was feeling the wetness of the tea between her bare legs. 

“Shit, fucking shit...” She forgot about her soaked legs, and her eyes stuck at the woman who was trying to convince her fluffy cat to stay inside, talking to him.

She knew that she didn’t see any pets when she was in there, but she wished she could’ve, because fuck, that was the cutest scene she’d ever seen that day.

Vanessa had even thought that she could give everything to hear that sweet talk. But she was too far, she could hardly see the movement of her red lips as she talked.

She watched her as she stood up and closed the door, stopped right in front of her car and layed her back onto that, lighting a cigarette and pulling her phone off her sparkly black purse, which was matching to her red bottoms. 

Vanessa was completely mesmerized. She’d never thought that a damn cigarette could look that good between anyone’s fingers. That was the first time she’d liked someone smoking, almost drooling over her. 

“Where are you going like this?” Vanessa bit her lower lip when Brooke fixed her cleavage while talking on the phone with a serious face, slightly opening it unconsciously. 

That was when Vanessa saw that she was wearing ‘her charm bracelet’ and let out a loud scream.

Her room door suddenly opened at the same time and Yvie ran through the window without a warning, stood right behind Vanessa, her face almost sticking to the window.

“Do you see what I fucking see?” She whispered behind Vanessa’s ears.

“I wish I did not,” Vanessa answered with the same dead tone. “Fuck, pinch me.” Otherwise she wouldn’t believe that what she saw was real.

“She’s wearing your fucking bracelet, Vanjie, like a proud girlfriend, your bracelet, your bracelet, your-“

“I know!” She whisper screamed and hold onto Yvie’s arm to not faint, and hold her breath while watching her every single movement. 

She wished if Brooke could wear that suit, with those stilettos, with that red lipstick on all the time -and maybe with Vanessa’s bracelet too- because she was definetely looking like a lesbian goddess, and that was so, so ethereal for both of the girls’ gay minds. 

They watched Brooke getting into her car after stubbing out her cigarette ‘on the top of her damn jeep’, and driving away fastly, with the same shocking look enriching their faces.

Yvie had recovered from the shock earlier after some time, but Vanessa was still trying to cope with that unbelievable hotness source walking through the road. 

“Did you fucking cum yourself or something?” Yvie asked with a shocked-disgusted face, pointing her wet thighs, making Vanessa realise how embarrassing the situation was looking.

“What the fu- hell no! That’s your gross tea, stupid. I spilled it all over myself because of that bitch.” They stopped for a moment, and let out a loud laugh at the same time. That was so fucked up yet so funny, they couldn’t stop snorting for a long while.

“Oh my god,” Vanessa said after calming down, shaking her head unbelievably. “She really put that bracelet on... I’m trying to stay away from her but she really makes it so much harder.” She bit her lip hardly. “I don’t even know her, Jesus!”

Vanessa knew that she didn’t have to look at Yvie’s face to see a confused look, because she knew that all her friend had wanted for her to let it go a little bit and get lost in the flow. But Vanessa was leaking too much confidence and good memories for that, which Yvie knew.

“Why are you trying to stay away though, Vanj? Can’t you just let it go o-“ 

“I don’t know, Yves.” Vanessa cut her right before burying her face down her hands and let out a deep breathe. “It’s just too much of an unnecessary risk after all that Kameron stuff and shit. I don’t think if I can take another car crush. I don’t wanna get into something while knowing that it’s gonna end someday.”

Yvie reached to her hands, and took them off her cloudy face. Then grabbed her chin and harsly turned to herself with an angry face, making the other girl cuss with pain.

“What the fuck does that mean, Vanessa?” She asked. Vanessa knew that things were serious when she uses her real name instead of her nickname. And she could feel that things were getting ‘incredibly serious’ at that point, when Yvie grabbed her chin like that.

“Then don’t do anything, just sit here like that,” Yvie spitted harshly. 

Vanessa couldn’t get what exactly she was saying for a long time, and blinked involuntarily. “Yvie, what are you-“

“If we shouldn’t have experience a shit because there’s a possibility for it to end one day, then we wouldn’t have been brought to this world stupid. Because we’re gonna leave at the end, aren’t we?” 

Vanessa crushed under the heaviness of the words even if she knew that Yvie was using sarcasm to make them sound more effective as always, and it was working. It was working enough to bring the familiar tears into Vanessa’s eyes immediately.

“You have to live to the full, Vanessa,” she didn’t care that Vanessa was about to cry because of the intensity of the words, and continued. “There’s a reason for us being alive here, there’s a reason that you’ve sent those stupid letters to a wrong adress, there’s a reason why that bitch cheated on you. There’s a fucking reason, and for once, I don’t want you to miss any opportunities because you’ve sadly learned too much too soon from the past. And it doesn’t mean that they’re gonna happen once again.”

She wiped her tears slowly with her thumbs like she’s done in the old days, when the teacher shouts at her for no important reason and Vanessa can’t keep herself away from sobbing.

“I want you to experience everything with its ups and downs, Vanessa.” She mumbled. “I just don’t want you to regret that you didn’t try.”

She pulled her friend into her arms hardly, and caressed her back as she melted into the tears, collapsing in sobs. “If you say ‘what if’ even just once, I’m gonna blame myself this time. So please, don’t be afraid. I won’t let you down again when you need me, I’ll be here.”

She said, shouting out to the long emotional talk they’ve gone through last night, and put a kiss on the top of Vanessa’s head. Her sobs were getting calmer, and she wasn’t shaking anymore.

“Thank you, Yves.” She said with a husky voice. Thinking how different things would be if she could reach Yvie at the times she felt the worst. But it was better late than never.

“I didn’t do anything,” Yvie said and pulled herself back, digged her hand down into her pocket right after that while Vanessa was watching her imperceptively. 

“What?” Vanessa asked when she handed a heavy thing to her.

Yvie laughed and pointed the old mobile phone to her in her little hands, which made Vanessa scream quietly. “You’re fucking kidding!” She said. Turning the old device around itself. 

“You’ll be able to call me anytime you need, and I won’t be that far anymore.” She mumbled, and made Vanessa pull her closer for another hug. 

***

“This one,” she raised her black swimsuit, “Or this one?” and the white pair of string bikinis. 

She had been trying to choose a proper outfit to go and see Brooke but after she failed, the girls have thought that it might be better to give her a helping hand.

All the girls pointed the white bikini at the same time. Yvie added with a little wink, “It’s easier to take off when you’re in need.” 

“No- ugh! For fuck’s sake, Yvie!” Vanessa screamed, and threw the hanger to her friend, but she couldn’t hit her because the taller girl was flexible enough to escape from that. 

When they’ve finally decided on the other things to wear too, the girls left her alone for some privacy.

Vanessa was so weirdly excited when she had first decided to visit Brooke, and her body was still slightly shaking with flush when she pulled her bikini bottoms onto her ass. 

She didn’t know how would Brooke react -even if she was the one who sneakingly invited her- or would she even be at home or not, but they thought it was worth a try because Vanessa was feeling so in mood today. 

When she finally put her oversized Led Zeppelin t-shirt on, exposing her curvy hips slightly, thought she looked really fine, actually quite attractive in the mirror. 

She did her hair a tight ponytail and checked her sharp eyeliner on the mirror. 

She was done, but not quite ready to leave and let it all go in front of the blondie.

“Hello,” she practiced against her reflection with a serious voice, but didn’t like the tone of it. “Oh, Hi,” she tried again, but hated it. “Hey Brooke,” whispered this time, but it was too inviting, Brooke could bend her down on her knees at that point, so she immediately sifted that option too.

“Who are you talking to?” she heard the voice of A’keria, then she appeared with two beer bottles. When she had realised what she was doing, she let out a loud laugh.

“Can’t believe that you’re practicing in the mirror, oh my god...” she said between her chuckles. 

“You remember when I got a crush on the popular kid of the senior class, what was his name? John, Jackson, Jabba?” She laid her shoulder to the closet and shrugged with his other shoulder while Vanessa was listening her cheerfully. “See, I don’t even remember! I was doing the same thing every fucking morning in case he decides to say hi to me. You know what happened after that? We dated once, it was a cinema date by the way, and I’ve realised that he was a complete douchebag. So baby, don’t do that until you get to know her better. Not worth your effort nor heartache.”She winked and made Vanessa chuckle too.

“Thank you Kiki,” she said and put a loud wet kiss onto her cheek and took the cold beers from her. “Don’t worry, I’ll be ok.”

She really was feeling good at that moment, as it showed on her face.

The wetness dripping through the cold bottles were making her realise that she was alive, and honestly, how desperately she was wanting to see Brooke. 

It was the same feeling as she was looking forward to a school trip, just to stay alone with her friends for two short days. That was the same excitement, but in a different time zone. She was feeling that the summer house could bring her some good vibes, even if they were probably gonna be temporary.

She left the house after saying bye to the girls, got in front of her house in no time flat, and pressed the doorbell softly with her matte red, manicured fingers.

She suddenly heard a cat meowing, and then footsteps that making her heart beat so fastly. “Stop, Apollo,” she could hear the soft voice coming from afar. “You’re gonna make me fall.”

She knew that it wasn’t more than a couple seconds, but the time it took until Brooke opened the door felt like a lifetime to Vanessa after that.

When their eyes met, Brooke’s face lightened up with a huge grin. “Oh, hey,” she murmured with the cat laying on her lap, hand slowly caressing his head, another one messing around her leg like he was protecting Brooke from her. 

Vanessa smiled softly, bended down and and caressed the gray cat’s soft fur slightly. 

Vanessa loved cats, of course, like she did all animals. She was more like a dog person actually, so she was surprised, because cats weren’t a big fan of her mostly. “Didn’t know you had cats...” she whispered while playing a little bit more with the little boy until he gets used to her a little bit, then let him go.

After she spent some time with the kitties like Brooke wasn’t there, she finally turned her gaze into Brooke’s greens, chuckled naturally and clashed the bottles together, “Actually, I came to see you. So... do you have some time for a beer in the pool?”

Brooke blinked, still suprised, and stammeringly invited her inside. “Of- of course, come in.” She said, and keeping out from under Vanessa’s feet. 

Vanessa gave her an adorable smile and passed her, touching her pinky finger slightly to Brooke’s wrist, letting her know that she saw the bracelet and she had gotten it. 

If Brooke was brave enough to put that on, it was nothing for Vanessa to give some positive signals.

“Want some snacks?” Brooke yelled as Vanessa walks through the pool like it was her own house, eyes scanning every detail carefully. 

“Would enjoy some ice cream, if you have any,” she responded, put the beers onto the floor. And sat onto a sunbed. 

Brooke’s house was decorated so modern and minimal, as Vanessa liked; she couldn’t help falling in love with every detail she catches and picturing herself living in this house with her.

“Of course,” she whispered to herself while looking through the plants covering all around the pool like a little forest. “As an introvert, you have to picture herself with her immediately, Vanjie, good job.” 

“Did you say something?” Brooke suddenly asked, appearing with two spoons and a cup of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, which always made Vanessa fail to say no. 

She suddenly forgot about the question Brooke’d asked, and moaned with satisfaction. “Oh my god, that’s my favorite, especially with pilsner!”

Brooke laughed and handed her the Ice Cream before sitting in front of her. “That’s my favorite too.” Vanessa smiled and nodded before she looked through Brooke from head to toe, sitting legs crossed confidently. She was looking so good again, even with her messy short hair and bare face, inside a satin basic nightie.

“How are you doing here?” She asked when Vanessa opened the beers with caps of the bottles, which clearly made Brooke quite impressed, and gave her one of them.

“Good,” Vanessa said, and took a little sip from her beer. “You know, we’ve known each other for like ten years so it’s not like something new for me. I just miss them a lot.” 

Brooke hummed with agreement while trying to open the Ice Cream cup pinned between herbare legs, “Yeah, I know how it’s like to be alone when you feel so down,” she said, and gave Vanessa a spoonful of Ice Cream when she could finally open it. Her focus was completely on Vanessa after that. 

“Yeah?” Vanessa said. It was cool to hear her opening up a little bit, because she had barely know a thing about her. “Is your family here or-“

“They live in Canada.” Brooke said with a sad face taking the place of her smile, apologizing right after cutting Vanessa’s words. “Sorry, I interrupted you.”

Vanessa grinned and licked her empty spoon cheerfully. “So, you’re a Canadian?” She asked. “That explains your kindness, I like that quite a lot.” Brooke smiled after hearing those words and lifted her shoulders a little bit. “Well, thank you?” 

Vanessa stuffed a huge amount of ice cream into her mouth and tried to talk with it. But her voice was sounding like coming from a cave, so she had to swallow it first, which made Brooke laugh. “Breathe,” she said with a sincere smile. “Promise I’ll buy more for you next time.”

When she heard that she was alreay mentioning of the next time, she felt like she was having a stroke, but in a good way. It was like knowing that you were at the last but the highest, most enjoyable turn of the roller coaster, and she couldn’t wait for that downfall.

“Sorry,” she said when she pulled her pieces together and cleaned her throat with some beer. “We were talking about you.”

“It’s okay,” Brooke said. “I loved hearing about you for months, I would love to listen more. Don’t pull yourself back.”

Brooke was so good at choosing her words right and carefully, Vanessa knew that she wasn’t saying that words for just to be told. She was so candid, which made Vanessa relax onto her chair a little bit more.

“‘M fine,” Vanessa said. “Just wanna know more about you.” When she leaned a little bit forward to rest her chin onto her hand, their knees touched together but none of them tried to pull them back, so they were gonna stay like that for a long while.

“What do you wanna learn?” Brooke giggled. “Should I feel like being interrogated?” 

Vanessa grabbed and hugged the cat walking on the sunbad, and knitted her eyebrows against Brooke, “No, of course, right sweet kitty? What’s his name?” Vanessa asked, completely changing the subject all of a sudden.

“His name is Apollo, and this is Henry,” she had called out for the brown furry cat running around the pool, making a little kiss sound. “Henry, come here baby,” 

When the cat didn’t mind her, she shrugged and rested her chin on both of her hands, faking Vanessa’s latest position. “They don’t like strangers, mostly. Especially Apollo, she loved you though. Right, baby?” She caressed his back with her fingers, and the cat suddenly crawled towards her side. Brooke Lynn sat alongside Vanessa’s chair to get him, and then grabbed her cat. “Yeah, right, come to mommy.”

While they were petting right next to her, Vanessa felt her heart melting at how beautiful she was talking to him all the time, and she suddenly found herself wanting all of that attention only for herself, getting too much into the moment already. 

She shaked her head and tried to find something less flirty to talk about, rather than how beautiful Brooke was looking with Apollo.

“When did you move here? You’ve decorated the place really cool, I love it.” Vanessa said nicely, but hands exposing her nervousness, and made Brooke smile wider.

“Thank you, that’s very nice to hear from you,” the blondie mumbled. “I didn’t move here completely as I planned, but bought the house last year. I actually live in LA, like, in all that mess...” she said and made Vanessa giggle with agreement. “So I needed an escape. I’m an interior designer. We run a company with my family, so... that’s kinda my job, you know.” 

Vanessa opened her eyes wide with shock and tried so hardly to not to spray the whole beer she had just chugged all over Brooke. “You do?” She asked after swallowing her draft.

“That’s so nice. It must be really hard to deal with.”

“Not that much,” Brooke smiled, still caressing the cat, “Not when you’re doing the job you love... Like, for me you’re a fighter. I would punch him on the face on day two if my boss would hit on me like that.” She raised her eyebrows and laughed nervously. “You’re too patient, I think,” she said, words changed the direction on the halfway, which came out of nowhere. 

“I bet you would,” Vanessa giggled softly and put her empty beer bottle onto the floor, not minding that she was digging the same stupid case over again. “Actually it’s not that frustrating unless he tries to get into my personal space.” 

Brooke wasn’t looking like buying that at all. She put a kiss on top of Apollo’s head and after making Vanessa crave for that kiss, she continued talking like nothing happened. “I think that’s completely unacceptable, Vanessa, even I could see from your words that it was getting too much lately, almost like harassment.” she spilled her words. 

“Put a ring on your finger like I said before and tell him you have a fiancé over here. Promise he won’t get the courage to hit on a taken woman, I’ve tried it before.” She winked, and made Vanessa just spurt out a little thank and swallow all of her other words hardly. 

She was feeling Brooke’s soft thighs peeking through the middy nightie, touching her own and getting hotter with the time, so she couldn’t stand sitting there, plus not being able to join their cute family picture with Apollo anymore, especially after that allusive speech. 

“Would you care if I get into the pool?” she immediately asked, hands waiting on her shirt’s skirt to pull it off. If A’keria would see her like that, she would mock her to death, asking her if she was on fire or shit, she thought. 

Brooke must not have expected that step from Vanessa either. Because when she had heard what she said, her lips parted in surprise for a few seconds.

“Sure,” she said while eyeing her tiny body from head to foot. “Let me change then.” When Vanessa nodded with a forced little smile, she set the cat free, stoop up and shaked off the nonexistent dust over her shiny legs. 

“You can take the ice cream into the pool,” she said while her voice is getting further and further. “But don’t let Henry eat it, his cuteness may fool you.”

***

“What was this one for?” Brooke asked, getting closer to Vanesa into the water. 

“Oh, that one,” Vanessa laughed and pulled Brooke’s wrist to herself softly to see her bracelet better, traced her fingers around the little heart full of hearts dangling charm, suddenly remembering all the details about the day that girls have given it to her. “It was two years ago, when I broke up with my girlfriend, they bought this to me and said this was gonna protect me from any possible heartbreaks, and help me to find love.” She smiled sadly after finishing her words. “It seems like it didn’t work perfectly.” 

Brooke pouted and slightly caressed Vanessa’s arm under the water, changing the subject right after that instead of taking the advantage of her sadness. She was feeling bad about that, and Brooke didn’t want to make her even worse, so she asked for another charm, which looked more fun. 

“What about this one?” She slightly moved the cocktail bottle charm onto her wrist and made Vanessa snort out. “You sure you wanna hear about this one?” she asked for her to confirm. “‘Cause you won’t be seeing me the same after learning how messy I could be when I get drunk. Like, ‘drunk’ drunk.”

Brooke nodded with excitement and curiosity, Vanessa had to let her guards down. “Okay,” she said, “here you go... It was my twentieth birthday I guess. We were all gathered at a strip clup, I mean as I remember, the night had started well. But then I’ve drunk too much. Like maybe one huge bottle by myself, you know.” 

Brooke laughed in shock, and Vanessa nodded like ‘I told you so’.

“I don’t remember the rest of the night but as the girls said, I’ve gotten laid with one of the strippers at the back rooms and then couldn’t find the house because I was all alone. I hardly remember Yvie finding me at the alley, throwing up into a trash bin.” Brooke was looking at her unbelievably after her last words, Vanessa had to hit her softly to make her come round. “Don’t look at me like that! That’s so embarrassing already! And that’s why the girls had bought me this charm, to laugh at me anytime they see it.”

They spent almost one hour talking about the memories wrapped around that little bracelet, their skins were starting to get wrinkled into the water. 

But at least she had a chance to get Brooke’s phone number, and learn more about her too, Vanessa thought. 

She knew how was her family and school life, how did she decide to move here... 

She knew that she was 34 years old, which made her shocked with the fact that she was six years older than her which sounded impossible.

Her zodiac sign was pisces, and Vanessa had always loved a pisces woman, so she was going with ten out of ten.

Her favorite food was apple pie, so she’d told that Vanessa striked her from the heart when she had brought her a handmade one.

She even asked her how did she like her egg, which was an enormous step.

Nothing was going wrong, and Vanessa was enjoying every moment she’s spending with her, beating every fact about Brooke into her brain well to not to forget. But the sun was going down, and Vanessa knew that she had to get onto her way slowly. 

“There are too many special memories on this, Vanessa,” Brooke said and tiddered the bracelet a little bit, and made a move to took it off. “Let me give it to you.”

But Vanessa stopped her with a little hand movement and sat onto the corner of the pool.

“You don’t have to take it off,” she said while squeezing the pool water off her hair. But Brooke was so insistent.

“I can’t keep this, really. It’s too special.” 

Vanessa smiled against her answer, and hold her thin wrist over the bracelet, fondling her damp skin gently.

“Keep it, so I can find an excuse to come and see you again,” she said, and stood up, leaving a shaken Brooke behind her. 

“Don’t have to see me off, I know the exit,” she said when Brooke tried to get off the pool, and glued her into her place. 

“Okay then,” Brooke said. “Be careful when you’re crossing over. There are usually a lot of drunk drivers during this time of the day.”

The blonde watched her from the pool, chin rested on her hands admiringly, while Vanessa spread her shirt over her wet body and teared her long ponytail away from its neck, while she was saying goodbye to the cats...

Vanessa gave her one last wave and sentence before leaving, and left her sight. But the sentence kept rebounding in Brooke’s mind for the next couple days.

“That red suit looked so good on you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess this was the longest chapter of the story, plus one of my favorites so I really can’t wait to hear your thoughts.
> 
> Thank you all so much for your positive feedbacks! They make me release a new episode every other day.
> 
> XOXO
> 
> p.s. Don’t forget to hit me up on Tumblr as alltherestisdrag if you have any requests or ideas. I’d love to hear and discuss.


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brooke is not afraid to make huge moves to pull Vanessa towards her anymore. Vanessa is completely ready to get in.

_**Dear Yvie,** _

_** (...) ** _

_** The work was so tiring today, but I had a chance to stop by the new coffee place opened around, and took a good fresh filter coffee.  ** _

_** It was fine, until I come across to Kameron. I swear she was about to catch me to talk and probably ask for another chance, but I skedaddled. Do you thing I did wrong? Maybe I should talk to her to say stay away from me. ** _

_** (...) ** _

_** I’ve been messing around some bars nowadays, but nothing serious is gonna happen ‘cause I’m so tired of cleaning the mess of my stupid exes and the dirt they’ve left in my life. ** _

_** I’m so happy that you could find Scarlet, because this bitch is cursed or something. I sometimes feel the need of someone to comfort me when I feel bad too, I have to admit.  ** _

_** Ugh, anyway, I think I’ll need some of your relationship advices soon, ‘cause my phone is starting to fill up with calls from the girls I’ve seen just for a drunk night, and I’m at the point that I don’t know what to do at all. You know that feeling better than me. ** _

_** (...) ** _

_** Send me one of your cocktail recipes next time, I’m running out of ideas and I wanna get drunk nowadays. ** _

_** Love you, ** _

_** Your local lesbian casanova, Vanjie ** _

***

Vanessa was so deep into the phone conversation when Silky had brought her a huge slice of chocolate cake. She kept herself so hardly not to throw the plate onto the wall, because once again, her boss was getting on her nerves.

“Yes, sir,” she said while rubbing her face. “I’ve told Plastique to check out the storehouse three times, so she must’ve bee-“ when the man on the other line cut her with his hasty words again, she exhaled loudly.

“Yeah, I know. But I can’t do anything for that right know except mailing her the documents over and over again. I’m ‘off’ duty.” She was so close to hit her head onto the cake plate with anger, but bit her lips instead, because her boss had been talking for half an hour, putting emphasis on a subject that Vanessa cannot do shit about from afar.

“Vanessa!” She suddenly heard Yvie calling her. “I need your help, baby. C’mere!”

That was like a rescue line for Vanessa, so she had grabbed it tightly. “Comin’!” she shouted and cut her boss’s unnecessary insistence. “I’m sorry, sir, I can’t do anything right now and I need to go help my friend if you don’t mind.”

When she could finally hang up, she stood up dizzily and got to Yvie’s side in no time flat, cussing steadily. “I swear to god, I’m so done with him,” She almost spitted when she grabbed the picture frames Yvie had just handed her while trying to hang. “He’s calling me and saying that there’s a problem at logistics, and how badly they, especially he, needed me... And I’m in the fucking designing team, Yvie! What can I do about his damn logistics?”

Yvie let out a huge laugh when she finished droving the nails onto the floor and got the frames back from Vanessa. “Sorry,” she said and continued after calming herself down a little bit. “I figured, that’s why I called you out. Couldn’t you just quit that shit already?” 

Vanessa sat on the floor and watched Yvie place their pictures framed poolside pictures, with a confused look.

“Brooke’s told the same too,” Vanessa shaked her head. She was getting so sick of that topic making her mind busy at least once a day. “I don’t know if I can find a company that pays me that much, Yves,” she said. “I’m literally fucked.”

“No,” Yvie said, and pointed her finger to her face. “But you do need to be fucked.”

Vanessa rolled her eyes and laid her back onto the cold brick wall of the fireplace, tucked some of or hair behind her ear. “Can’t you stop referring to her for a minute?” She mumbled. She was already craving for Brooke, and Yvie wasn’t helping her at all.

“Y’all, speaking of the devil,” Silky stepped into the room, proclaiming that she was spying upon them, carrying a sparkly little bag. “Your sugar mama brought you another gift and it turns out that I’m the courier of the house for her.”

Vanessa ran through the door and immediately took the bag off Silky’s hand. “Call her my sugar mama again and watch me how hard I can punch someone on the face,” she murmured and started torturing her lips by biting them, sitting on the beanbag to open the package.

“Did she really?” Yvie gasped when Vanessa pulled out a Tiffany box out of the bag. “Holy shit,” Silky added. She was as surprised as them. 

Vanessa opened the box with her shaky hands and saw a little tag charm, with ‘priceless’ letters on it. Right next to a little clip to attach it onto her slightly thicker bracelet, which was with Brooke at that moment.

“Holy shit,” Silky repeated. “That little thingy is like four hundred dollars, Vanj. What did you say to her to make her fall this hardly?”

Vanessa was completely unaware of what was going on around her and what were her friends saying, because the thing had gotten her was the little note peaking through the sparkly gift box, in comparison with the ridiculously expensive charm.

_** Thank you for yesterday, I really enjoyed it. ** _

_** I can’t promise that this charm is gonna prevent the bad luck and events, but I couldn’t find anything that defines you better after last week. ** _

_** Text me when you get this ** _

_** XOXO ** _

_** Brooke ** _

***

**_ V: tell me you jokin _ **

Vanessa’s fingers quickly moved over her keyboard, while her mind was working fast to find another thing to say, something would express her gratefulness, but she was speechless, shuttered, and completely ensorceled. 

She had to try so hard to calm down the girls, but she was failing to do the same for herself.

Brooke was much chiller and faster, almost like she had been waiting for her to response since she had given the bag to Silky.

_** B: You like it? ** _

Vanessa had not liked it, she was loving it. And Brooke paying that much money for her favor all of a sudden was completely unexpected for her. 

Maybe that’s because she had been learning about her a lot for the past a few months, she consoled herself. Maybe she knew her enough to get impressed, more than she had let anyone except her best friends.

She gulped with the sensation sprawling inside her body.

She was so used to being acted like a fuck buddy in her relationships, maybe a second option for someone if she was lucky, she was having a really hard time trying to understand how kind a human being could act against her romantically. 

She was so embarrassed, yet flattered, her hands stuck like that for a minute to figure out what she was doing. What were they doing.

To figure out when they have gotten this far, when Brooke had started to make her this excited...

Her phone started buzzing with Brooke’s full name flashing on the screen, she suddenly threw the phone onto the other side of the bed, and buried her face into her soft pillow to ignore it. Because she was shaking, and she knew that her voice did too. 

Everything was easier for her when it comes to hooking up, maybe a little bit teasing, because Vanessa knew she was so good at it with her tiny body crawling up on a stranger’s bed. It was easy at a bar lounge, on the dance floor, with a little tipsinness taking over her mind, sweaty bodies touching each other slightly when she was dancing amongst her favorite disco songs.

Everything was easier when an older woman was watching her curling up her body with the rhythm of the song perfectly, through the bar chairs, and giving her a little wink right before she pushes herself right into her arms.

But not when she was completely sober. Not when there was no music, no neon lights leaving a faint lightning in her eyes which was making her feel like she was in a dream, no alcohol, no winks and no pure sex. Not when there’s only romance.

Vanessa was struggling, yet dying to take that sensation and experience it inside all of her veins.

The phone stopped ringing after some time, and she went for a deep exhale, as if she was holding her breathe inside until then. “What am I gonna do with you,” she mumbled after turning around her bed for a long time. Maybe for ten minutes, maybe twenty, and suddenly heard a familiar voice coming through the door.

“What you wanna do?” The voice prinked up with a beautiful chuckle, and Vanessa lifted her face up from her bed with her mouth turning into an ‘o’ shape. 

“When did you- how-“ she froze, not even being able to finish her words while straightening up on the bed and covering her frightened body gestures with the silk bedsheets.

“It turns out that your friends want me around more than you do,” she jeered and waited in front of the door, waiting for Vanessa’s permission.

Vanessa had a chance to take a glance at Brooke while she had gotten over the shock a little bit, while Brooke was standing there, and fuck, she would rather being temporary blind, instead of crushing under her strong silhouette and gaze at that moment.

‘Cause she was wearing ‘that’ red suit again, fully embracing the power she holds in her hands against the younger girl, and from this close, Vanessa was right at the corner of fainting.

“Wha- I did not say that-“ she kept stuttering, so keeping her mouth shut did seem better when she had no ability to talk left. 

“May I please come in?” Brooke asked, couldn’t stand not being able to stay closer to her, and sat next to Vanessa on bed timidly, right after the brunette nodded with approval.

“Did you miss me?” Brooke mocked, slightly pushing Vanessa to the left with her shoulder. Smaller girl was starting to soften into the moment, letting out a little chuckle.

“Stop,” she said with a faint titter. “I’m quite embarrassed because of your gift already.”

“Why though?” Brooke asked while Vanessa couldn’t take her eyes off her own hands, not gathering the courage to place them onto Brooke Lynn’s flawless look. “I love giving gifts, especially to the people I like.”

Vanessa had to look into her eyes to understand if she was making fun of her or not, but under that smoky eye makeup, she could see that she was talking the truth, waiting for a positive response from Vanessa.

“Oh my god,” Vanessa mouthed instead of giving her what she had wanted. “I- you don’t even know me properly, Brooke, c’mon...”

She knew that those words would frustrate Brooke enough to leave, but her words were sealed when the older girl grasped her chin with two of her fingers, long red nail scratching her skin with the movement slightly.

She was not frustrated, she was incredibly mad, and Vanessa was getting excited with the domination she could feel into her growing pupils, even if she didn’t mean to show it to her, not yet. But Vanessa knew it once she saw, like she had never missed.

“I know you Vanessa,” Brooke said, taking the topic to the opposite direction. “I’ve been reading about all of your feelings since last year, so don’t you dare alleging that shit against me.”

Vanessa gulped, and opened her mouth slightly to give her a response, but Brooke was faster at putting her words together. “I know that how you feel when someone raises their voice at you, I know how much you hate waking up early in the morning,” her voice had gotten lower with the time passing by, and Vanessa kept herself so hard to not to jump onto her lips with the purest feelings.

“I know you’re afraid of butterflies and you faint when you touch one of them, I know that you get so overwhelmed when you can’t explode to someone about your feelings,” she let Vanessa’s chin free with a little bit shyness appearing inside suddenly because she realised she had gotten maybe too far, and played with her nails, hands resting on her lap. But Vanessa was about to beg her to get her fingers back onto her skin one more time.

“I know how bad you got hurt during all of your relationships, which was a work of the devil, I know you don’t believe in fucking love, at least you try not to, and I know that you’re afraid of being heartbroken once again,”

Vanessa had to let out a shaky breath after those words, because she knew that the huge crush she’s been waiting for was about to happen, making her feel freaked out and relieved at the same time. “I do know you Vanessa. I see you, and I like what I see.”

“Fuck,” Vanessa mumbled, she was ready to cry again with the intensity building inside her chest.

“And I know that you cry so easily, damn.” Brooke spitted, and made both of them laugh as if they were not talking about a serious, serious situation. 

Vanessa wiped her tears with the back of her hands, and asked right after licking her dried lips. “So,” she mumbled, trying not to get terrified. “You wanna try or somethin’?”

Brooke shrugged, and a little grin appeared on her plump, red lips. “I just wanna see how far can we take this.” she said, and played with a little curl of Vanessa’s long hair, internally waiting for a positive response.

Vanessa was thinking, thinking so hardly, thinking with all of her guts, all of her experiences, meanwhile trying not to forget how Yvie charged her with letting it go a little bit.

Brooke could read them all through her soaked eyes, contemplating about how she’d pictured them months ago; laying down onto a matress, or maybe a floor, her trying to calm down Vanessa’s nerves a little bit, hand caressing her soft hair and the younger girl talking about what’s going into her mind without stopping even for a moment. 

Those thoughts could be getting real at that moment.

They let out a deep breathe at the same time with the heaviness getting off their shoulders a little bit, and Vanessa chuckled as she realised that.

“How long it’s been since you’ve like... wanted?” Vanessa asked, trying to figure out which stupid letter of hers pulled Brooke so into her.

“Remember the one you’ve talked about Yvie’s sickness?” she said, and ringed Vanessa’s hair around her finger once more, faces getting closer with the time.

“Yeah,” Vanessa said with a nod. She was remembering that as if it was yesterday, how worried she had felt about her friend feeling bad.

“Hmm, after that one,” Brooke said, eyes meeting Vanessa’s parted lips. “Right after I have realised how attentive and cute you could be.” She smiled after seeing Vanessa blinking with a surprised face. “Don’t look at me like that,” she stimulated. “I just do like a caring woman, can’t toss out the fact that you’re so pretty too, of course,” she said, and had gotten a little fake punch onto her shoulder from Vanessa.

“Stupid,” Vanessa mumbled. “You’re so stupid.”

Right at that moment, Brooke knew that they had compromised at some point, a sincere smile taking over both of their faces; so she cupped Vanessa’s cheek with her palm fearlessly, caressing her soft skin with her thumb slightly.

“I’ll take that,” she said. “You care for a kiss?” After Brooke’s giber wink, Vanessa let out a frank laugh and straightened up on her knees to be able to reach the blondie’s dimension, toes curling up with satisfaction.

Brooke accepted her bid, pressed her lips together while her other hand finding her face too, smiling into Vanessa’s mouth which was sucking her lower lip, smudging her lipstick, leaving a red mark around her mouth.

“Cherry,” Vanessa murmured after they hardly parted their lips apart, hitching a breath while her chest goes up and down with the sensitivity of the moment. “Put a cherry chapstick on tomorrow.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chi Chi, I love you my angel. You’ll always be in our prayers.


	5. Chapter Five - Cheers to Our Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The summer had ended, Vanessa leaves and goes back to working.  
> They somehow make it work with loyalty.  
> But after months of staying away, Vanessa doesn’t want to spend the Christmas all alone.  
> Brooke has to find a solution.

_**Dear Yvie,** _

_** How many letters I’ve sent you during the last six months? Fifteen? Seventeen? Or maybe even a solid twenty?  ** _

_** I couldn’t realise how much of a habit it had turned out until I run out of my pretty scented envelopes.  ** _

_** Yeah, this is the last one left -I saved the best one for the last as you smell- and I think I’m gonna quit, wait for the huge summer trip instead of begging you to write me back every single time. ** _

_** ‘Cause bitch, I ain’t paid twenty bucks to these pretty shit to waste them, and I ain’t sending you these long ‘amazing’ letters in basic envelopes either. So I deserved a recess, arrivederci! ** _

_** Okay, well, seriously, maybe you can get a damn phone and try to call me, so I can breathe peacefully, knowing that you’re doing well. ** _

_** I wanna hear that from you, I missed your voice, stupid! I’m about to forget that rusty tone so you better fasten your pace to call me back. ** _

_** If you wanna hear about me, I’m doing okay. I’m healthy, beautiful, completely single, and definitely not ready to mingle, well, yet.  ** _

_** I’ll be sending my latest polaroid, in case you wanna see my new hair color. ** _

_** Also I moved my house! Did Scarlet tell you that? No? Well, I did, and my new place is much closer to the work. ** _

_** At least I won’t be waking up early to call an uber, and my new landlady is not that bitchy this time. She even said I could bring home anyone I wanted, unless we make too much noise. She was so cool, seriously. The house is pretty good too, I even have an empty room, but A’keria was mocking about turning that into a playroom. I started to think that it’s not the worst idea had came from her, huh? ** _

_** It ended up staying as the laundry room, unfortunately. ** _

_** Kameron is still calling me, in case you wonder, and I still don’t answer. I’m thinking about calling her back, though. I feel so servile but I’m literally craving for some attention nowadays. Don’t get mad at me, singleness is not that enjoyable as I’ve thought it could be. I’m trying my best. ** _

_** Maybe if y’all would be here, I wouldn’t feel so desperate, ugh, not saying for you to feel guilty, just telling the truth. ** _

_** Do you remember the time when we last had a slumber party and talked all night long?  ** _

_** Yeah, I think I miss our that mood the most. ** _

_** (...) ** _

_** Please take care of yourself well, I’ll be thinking of you guys everyday as always.  ** _

_** Love you and miss you a lot, ** _

_** Your bitch, Vanessa Vanjie Mateo ** _

***

“Wine or champagne,” Brooke asked, and looked back at Vanessa over her shoulder, who was laying down on the corner sofa and watching Brooke like she was missing her even from that little distance. 

“Champagne,” she mumbled with a cracking voice, a little husky because it was their last summer day. “Gotta celebrate our two month anniversary before I leave.”

“Anniversary, huh?” Brooke murmured when she had grabbed two champagne glasses and a good bottle from the bar cabinet. 

“Don’t look at me so mirthless like that,” she put the bottle and glasses onto the coffee table, and sat next to Vanessa with a compassionate look on her face. “Can’t stand you being sad even if you look so pretty with those pouted lips.” 

Vanessa fixed her expression when she’d realised how childish she was looking, and looked right into Brooke’s gaze. “‘M just gonna miss you so much,” she mumped. “I can’t even bear the thought of you being afar.”

Brooke pulled Vanessa onto her lap, legs cooping her thin waist in, and brushed their lips together which made Vanessa melt into a kiss. “I’m gonna be this close,” she said, whispering through her soft lips. “Whenever you need, promise.”

Vanessa licked her lips, knowing that picturing them together wasn’t gonna fill the shoes of them being together everyday, cooking together and ending up with messing up their clothes, exploring new places around the city, falling asleep in the same bed after some good time... She was gonna miss that specific summer so badly.

Not just because of Brooke, but also how much of a good time they’ve spent with the girls, just like the old days: Filled with movie, gossip nights and countless slumber parties, as if they were not grownup people.

Memories were overflowing off her heart after she had spent some time thinking them just like that. Then they were turning into tears, tears that making Brooke’s heart stutter.

“No, Vanessa, please don’t do this to me or I won’t be able to let you go,” she said, voice trembling. She was already blue because of the fact thay they were gonna see each other only once a week, twice, if they were lucky, and Vanessa crying like an actual baby on her lap wasn’t helping her to stay strong at all.

“Look at me, baby,” she whispered and grabbed Vanessa’s chin slowly, making her look right into her greens. “I promise I’ll come and see you every weekend, and call you every night, right before you fall asleep, so I can give you a goodnight kiss...” she put a wet kiss onto Vanessa’s neck when she finished her words, and made her squirm onto her lap uncomfortably. 

“So let’s enjoy our last night, okay? ‘Cause I promised the girls that you’re theirs tomorrow.”

Vanessa nodded, like a good girl, and grabbed the heavy champagne bottle Brooke had just handed her to make it pop. 

She served a huge sincere grin to Brooke after curling her fingers around the bottle’s neck, like she wasn’t suffering internally, and removed the foil around the cap, loosening the wire carefully right after that.

Brooke pulled Vanessa closer as she directs the mouth of the bottle off the sofa, and continued giving her soft kisses and bites, clearly were gonna stay as faint marks. 

Vanessa whined when Brooke suddenly teethed her earlobe, and whispered: “We’re gonna spill the whole bottle all over us, stupid.”

“Better,” Brooke grinned. “So I’ll have a solid reason to take that thin shirt off your body.”

Vanessa chuckled alluringly, and popped the bottle, took it into her mouth right after that clever answer.

She could feel the bubbles running through her gullet, and most of them overflowing from her mouth, leaving a wet, shiny texture on her chin and neck for Brooke’s favor.

“So pretty,” Brooke said. Her eyes were getting darker with naughtiness. Vanessa swallowed all of the sip when the blondie licked, sucked the taste of the champagne over her neck and chin, she couldn’t help but close her eyes and moan loudly. “Fuck, mommy.”

Their bodies trembled with the cold champagne suddenly sliding between Vanessa’s hands, spilling all over their laps. But they’ve already lost their whole attention into a kiss, sharing the remaining liquid left Vanessa’s mouth like it was no big deal.

The brunette climbed upwards on Brooke’s lap a little bit without letting their lips apart and then wrapped her legs around her waist, which made Brooke cup her hips and dig her nails into the softness of them.

Since the first time they have put their hands onto each other, they knew that it was gonna be different. They knew that ‘they’ were different. Much more different than everybody else who had gotten into their lives before. They were making each other erase all the negative past agone.

The feeling between them was always so intense, and it wasn’t based only upon sexual attraction, most likely the other way round, they were falling so hard with the time flying by. Epecially at the times when they get to talk to each other, whispering into their ears how good they were doing, how much it meant to them... 

The same thing even had driven them into an unexpected open up, which started with Brooke’s “I love you” whispers. 

“I love you,” she had said when Vanessa was kissing her inner thighs and murmuring the most beautiful compliments Brooke had ever heard. “I love you, I- fuck- I love you Vanessa.” 

It was a month ago, but Vanessa was still remembering that as if it was yesterday. Even if she couldn’t say it back, she knew that Brooke was making it easier, not pushing her even for a moment.

Obviously, Vanessa’s all fears were turning out useless with the time she was spending with Brooke, because she was taking care of her so ridiculously well.

They have fit with each other almost like puzzle pieces, even the girls were saying. Vanessa needed someone like her, someone who could give all of her love and attention, and finally, after countless ups and downs, she was getting it. 

She was clearly remembering the first time they’d touched each other, how they were both approaching their movements with suspicions.

It wasn’t the first time for either of them, they were both knowing their pros and cons at the time, but when things happen to get into a point that their happinesses were all that matter, they suddenly tend to forget everything they had experienced before each other.

She remembered how Brooke was freezing with bated breath anytime Vanessa moves her body like she didn’t like the way she goes, and letting a relieved exhale right after she understands that it was her who was making it up in her mind.

She remembered how they released that stress with time, which was the only cure, and it turned out how right she was about thinking that Brooke was an impenitent dominatrix, making Vanessa melt under her gaze and making her cry and beg every single time, without a little bit of compunction. 

She was the only one who could supply her needs up to that time, and Vanessa was so grateful.

She was so grateful for every moment they’ve spent holding hands, laughing and crying at everything together for two months, and most importantly, she was so grateful that they were taking a leaf out of each other’s books every other day.

***

“I don’t wanna leave,” Vanessa whined when Brooke tucked some wavy hair behind her ear. “I’ll miss this house.”

“I’ll miss seeing you around here, baby,” Brooke mumbled, and placed a kiss on top of Vanessa’s head. 

Suddenly all memories of Vanessa circuiting around the house with her oversized shirts were mobbing into the older girl’s mind, and it was almost physically painful knowing that she won’t be seeing her in here like that for a long time soon.

“Today is Monday, and I’ll be there on Saturday. Soon enough, huh?” She tried to soothe her own thoughts by consoling Vanessa. 

Vanessa nodded, and grabbed the strap of her travelcase tightly, full of garments she had left all around Brooke’s house for two months. 

“I’m a patient woman, you know that,” she winked and made Brooke smile widely, then find the fake engagement ring around Vanessa’s finger. 

It was one of Brooke’s everyday gifts for Vanessa, but more likely to foist off by saying it’s an engagement ring because of the diamond embellishering that, so they have decided on that before Vanessa packed her stuff a little while ago.

Also Vanessa liked to keep it around her finger, which was making her feel so attached and much closer to Brooke. And if they would keep up the good ‘work’, it might get real one day, she thought.

“Rub this into his hungry eyes, okay? And don’t forget to show off with my pictures.” Brooke charged her with the mockery surrounding around her voice, and made Vanessa chuckle with an unsatisfied expression on her face, slightly wrinkling her nose.

“Time to go?” Vanessa asked after she could finally stop her giggles.

She was so unwilling to leave, she would rather giggling like that for a long, long, long time honestly. 

The fact that she tried so hard not to hug Brooke’s waist and beg her to keep her forever was making her lowkey terrified, with realising what kind of love she had gotten into. 

It didn’t matter though, because she had to go and make some money to continue her life peacefully at the end.

“I think so,” Brooke whispered, and saw her off through the door. “Call me when you were about to leave for airport, okay?”

“Okay, I’ll see you there.” Vanessa stood on her tiptoes and gave her one last kiss, and caressed the cats’ heads who’s been messing around their feet lately after that.

When Vanessa said bye and almost run through the street after checking the road, Brooke watched her until she gets into the house and closed the door behind her back.

There was no chance for Brooke to stay away from that angel for more than two days, after waiting her for months, she realised, and she thought that she needed to find a solution.

She had to find a solution.

***

“Almost two months since I last saw her, Yves,” she groaned, trying to outtalk the rain patters. 

She was hardly keeping her umbrella in the midst of her fingers because of the wind. Even the Christmas lights and shiny decorations weren’t enlightening the dark, foggy street.

Vanessa would rather a good snowy day at Christmas eve, but a smudgy, muddy disaster was all they were getting apparently. 

The rain soaking her down -even under the umbrella- was doing a good job at hiding her tears though.

“Do you see her a lot around there?” She asked while sniveling. Thinking Brooke decorating around the house with huge Christmas trees and stuff, wishing if she could be there to help too. 

“Yeah,” Yvie answered through the line. “She’s watching outside a lot nowadays, still pretty, if you wonder. She didn’t even have any time to decorate her front yard, I guess.” 

The answer didn’t seem enough for Vanessa, made her wanna sob instead. She was craving to get more about her, even if they talk on the phone, do a FaceTime call only if they were lucky, every few days.

Brooke had been struggling with work a lot, traveling all around the country for launching, and their saturdays were dissolving with the time. And disturbing her by begging her to come between all of her busyness was not Vanessa’s thing.

That was the first time when Vanessa couldn’t tell everything going on her mind to Brooke, just for not making her sad while she was already pursuing. 

“‘M trying to be okay,” Vanessa murmured and furled her umbrella as she gets into her apartment, rain waters dripping down over it.

“It’s just... just like we’re moving away. I know it’s not her fault and I’m being selfish, but I wanna be with her every fucking day.” 

She stuck her phone between her face and shoulder, pulling off her leather raincoat and booties over the door.

“I can’t, Yvie. How I’m gonna earn money if I quit the job? There’s no way I’d depend on her for a living. Not that she wouldn’t give me no shit, it’s just... not my thing. Don’t act like you don’t know me.”

She threw herself on the sofa, closed her eyes and rubbed her face slowly. “I know, Yves,” murmured, and wiped her tears with her hands, knowing that she was fucking up her heavy eye makeup. “It’s just, I don’t wanna spend ‘the’ Christmas without her. You guys are already in there and now she says she won’t be able to come too and I’ll be all alone and... yeah-“

“Don’t yell at me, stupid,” she continued when Yvie tried to convince her to go to company’s Christmas party. “It’s a costume ball, you like costume balls! You can even wear a sexy Mrs. Claus dress, just imagine,” She was saying, “It’s better than staying home alone and watching Grinch for the fifth time, Vanj!”

There was no fucking way Vanessa was going to that ball without her partner and having to spend way more time than she could handle with her garrulous coworkers. But she said okay, just to shut Yvie up, and hang up faster.

When she could finally throw the phone onto the sofa, she was unable to hear herself think. Just some Christmas songs coming through the street artist playing at the end of the street, and their neighbors partying like there was no tomorrow. It seemed unnecessarily loud for a second, too loud.

When she heard a thud from the back rooms, she suddenly froze with the goosebumps surrounding her body. “Fuck,” she whispered, tucked her phone into her leather skirt’s belt and grabbed the glass wase filled with deadflowers, spilling its water. “Who’s there?”

She didn’t know if that step was wise, but her mind wasn’t working anymore. So she stood up, and slowly walked into the hall. 

“Plastique?” She asked, wishing them to be her assistant, remembering the key she had given to her before, to get the files they had needed.

Clanks quietly continued coming from her bedroom, which was making Vanessa even more frightened as she gets closer. “Puss-puss,” she tried once more, thinking it might be a little kitten somehow got inside. 

She opened the door slightly, holding her breath, her heart was beating fast, almost getting off her chest. That could be the most frightening thing that could happen to an anxious person, she had thought. 

“Up against the walls!” She suddenly shouted and pushed the door hardly, which would be the dumbest thing she could ever do if she was in real danger.

When she saw a blondie on the floor, trying to pick up the jewelry scattered around the fallen box, she couldn’t figure out what was happening for a long while, she was completely frozen.

The blonde head caught Vanessa’s shocked gaze over her shoulder and mouthed. “Busted.”

Vanessa swallowed hardly, put the vase onto the floor and held onto the wall to not to fall because of the intensity of the feelings suddenly building inside her. She couldn’t say anything except, “What the fuck, Brooke?”

She had no idea what was going on when Brooke gathered all the mess together, placed carefully and got to Vanessa in no time flat. 

The younger girl was still so confused, almost convinced that she was in a dream, and Brooke was gonna disappear in two minutes. She was in complete shock, and had no power to utter a word.

“Aren’t you happy to see me, baby?” Brooke pulled Vanessa into her arms, and buried her face into her neck.

“Are you really here? Like right now?” Vanessa asked as if her eyes were lying to her, and wrapped her arms around Brooke’s neck tightly when she realised.

“I might be that puss,” Brooke chuckled into Vanessa’s ear, and made her melt in her arms.

“Why didn’t you call me before you get in?” Vanessa asked. “Most importantly, how the fuck did you get in?”

Brooke digged her hand into her jean’s pocket, and shaked the pink fluffy holder with a key in front of Vanessa’s eyes, and made her realise that Plastique was in it too.

“Then it wouldn’t be a surprise, dumbie,” Brooke answered her first question, and caressed her hair softly. “I fucked it up by myself though, I was just trying to put my phone onto the nightstand, but I think I threw it too hard...” Vanessa couldn’t keep herself but laugh after that confession, and got closer for a little kiss.

“Could you really believe that I would leave you alone at Christmas?” She mumbled, and fondled the brunette’s face with the palm of her hand. “I would never,” she continued. “I’d delay all the launching and shit if it would be necessary, just for you.”

Vanessa pushed herself to Brooke for another kiss, and didn’t let her go until she fullfill her longing, while grabbing the collar of her shirt tightly.

“I missed you so much, you can only imagine,” she whispered into her mouth, and gave her one more little kiss right after that. “This is the best Christmas gift I’ve ever received.”

***

“Let’s open it!” Vanessa insisted, clapping like a little child when she handed her the big gift box.

“Okay, okay,” Brooke murmured, and tore the sparkly wrapping of it.

They were having an amazing time since Brooke had arrived, so Vanessa was trying to use their every second as good as possible. Like she does at that moment, curling under Brooke’s arms with a little whine.

She pulled her bare leg towards herself when Brooke attempted to open the box, and got a little bit closer under the Christmas three, surrounded by a dozen of packages. 

She was wanting to bring the time back when they had a chance to decorate the huge three together, all mocking and laughing, because she knew that Brooke was gonna leave next day, and it was so tougher than she could ever imagine.

“Oh my god, Vanessa,” Brooke gasped as she opened the box, grabbed the leather, pink strap on tightly, which was making Vanessa tremble intensely on her place. 

“Fuck, didn’t know you would want this,” Vanessa chuckled and let out a heavy breath as Brooke plays it upon her waist, measuring the harness carefully.

“Yeah,” the younger girl bit her lips, and shrugged slightly.

“I couldn’t think of a thing that you don’t have, so I’ve decided to give you some special time, you know...”

Brooke smirked, and pulled Vanessa by her wrist, giving her a little, but a temptress kiss. “My clever baby,” she mumbled between their kisses. “Can’t wait to use this on you...”

When they parted their bodies apart with their lipsticks mixed together, Vanessa eyed her partner from head to foot, gasping over on how good she was looking in her little, their matching Mrs. Claus dress, lipstick smudged down to her chin, her milk white legs shining through the mini skirt and the long strap on dangling between her legs. That was so enchanting, Vanessa had to gulp hardly to pull her pieces together.

“Take it off for now,” she mumbled. “I still have many gifts for you and I don’t wanna disrupt our giving session.” 

Brooke nodded and winked as she takes the strap off, digging into the box to take the other things left in there.

When her gaze met with a stack of envelopes, her eyes suddenly teared with emotions. “You didn’t,” she whispered.

“Tell me you didn’t...”

“Oh I did, Miss,” Vanessa got closer to Brooke as she toys with the letters, and sat onto her lap comfortably. “There’s no wrong adress this time. They’re all have written for you.”

Brooke caressed her hair a little bit amiably and then took the red envelope with their pictures and a number one tag on it, smelling like a delicious chocolate cake. “Want me to read it now?” She asked, and looked towards to her as Vanessa shakes her head with nervousness.

“No,” she whispered after that. “Read them when you miss me or somethin’. Like- not when you’re with me, okay? I’d want to curl up and die if you did right now, oh god...” 

“Well, I wonder even more right now, but o-kay.” Brooke chuckled and gave Vanessa a tight hug thankfully before putting a little kiss onto her soft cheek.

She was so happy, as much as Vanessa. They’ve gotten to know each other for the pastsix months to well, the younger girl knew that a gift she had prepared with her hands and soul would make Brooke the happiest, and she was completely right. 

She had gotten a chance to make Brooke speechless by giving her the reason of their blooming love, some letters had written just for her. And that was the best she could do, even if there were still a lot of romantic, even kinky things she haven’t given to her yet, waiting under the tree.

“Now my turn!” Brooke said after a long while they have given to themselves to soothe their emotional minds a little bit, and pulled one of the remaining gifts to herself.

“I have just one this time, but I’m pretty assertive about this,” she said, and handed the little box to her.

Vanessa was so excited to get it, she couldn’t help but shake it around her ear to understand what was in it, but she didn’t get anything else than a little clank. “Bluetooth vibrator?” She guessed, and made Brooke snort with joy. 

“No, stupid,” she was hardly keeping her laugh inside, “You already have one in there, don’t you?” 

“You know I do,” Vanessa winked and opened the box, knowing that she would never be able to guess what was coming from her most-amazing-gift-giver-girlfriend. 

“What’s this?” She raised eyebrows when she found the key, with a fluffy bear keychain attached to it, trying to figure out by turning it around itself.

“Is this a house key or shit? Or maybe the key of your heart, huh?” Vanessa smiled, knowing that Brooke was hiding a beautiful thing inside her mind.

“Bingo! It is a house key,” Brooke said softly, and wrapped her arms around Vanessa’s little waist. “But it’s not a regular house key,” She added, as her girlfriend lays her back onto her chest.

“It’s ‘our’ house key.”

Vanessa was confused, trying to understand if she was thinking could be real, or she was making it up because she wanted it too much. 

But Brooke was giving no more clues, she was almost pushing her to ask more about that little metal piece.

“What’chu mean, Brookie?” Vanessa asked, using her little nickname to warm her up a little bit, and gave the blondie what she wanted.

“I’m moving, Vanessa. Like I’m moving ‘here’, New York, bringing all the work with me, and I want you to stay with me. Only if you want, of course.”

Vanessa’s mouth went into an ‘o’ shape in no time, and she pushed Brooke away from herself to see her expressions better. “Are you fucking kidding me, Brooke? ‘Cause if you do, I’m not fucking you tonight because of that stupid joke,” she grunted.

She waited like that for a second or so, and continued with her confusement growing even bigger, “You’re saying that you’ll change all your life and schedule just because I’m here? Are you serious? Like ‘serious’ serious? Ma’am, that’s not an easy thi-“

“I’ve thought about that ‘a lot’, Vanessa,” Brooke interrupted her, and held the brunette’shands tightly. “Of course I know that it’s not an easy decision, but it won’t be such a struggle either, okay? So don’t worry.” She gulped with excitement and a little bit fear against to the possibility that Vanessa might reject her. “I just don’t wanna live away from you anymore. I can’t even stand the idea of that. I love you so much, Vanessa. You know that, right?” It was the most honest moment of Brooke, Vanessa had seen that night, she felt like reading all of her feelings all of a sudden, and she was terrified. Terrified to break her heart, terrified to lose her, terrified to stay away from her...

“So,” Brooke added. “Will you or will you not stay with me? ‘Cause the house is all clean and big and pretty and I’ve designed and decorated all just for you and-“

If Vanessa could die because of love, she would be found dead multiple times, she thought. She would never believe if someone said she was gonna fall in love after that many unsuccessful attempts, she would laugh, laugh so hard. But there she was at the same point, but ‘real’ this time, more intense, more sincere, more giving, more, more... Like a way she had never felt before. Like a way she would never want to let it go.

After crying and whining over how far they were living and how hard it was for her to not seeing Brooke, she was giving her the best gift she could ever ask for, wrapped with a package of pure love, she could feel. Her heart was pounding with all the beautiful emotions, making her want to kiss Brooke until she runs out of breath. 

At that moment, she remembered how freaking lucky she was, when she considers how accidental their encountering was.

If she would die right there, right at that point, she would die as the happiest girl in the world regardless, she thought. 

“Of course, Brooke, oh my god,” Vanessa threw herself into Brooke’s arms once more, hugging her as tightly as she could, shaking with her emotions overflowing her body.

Right before referring to the last letter she’s written to Brooke, she put a wet kiss onto her neck, exposing all of her terrifying feelings for the first time, pulling her girlfriend into a fairytale eventually. 

“I love you, Brooke,” she whispered into her ear, ”I’ve never thought that I could fall in love this hard, but fuck, I freaking love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ll miss writing this story, I’ll miss my broken Vanessa and lover Brooke. I’ll miss them.  
> So there’s no doubt I’ll be writing more fics very soon. Stay tuned.
> 
> Anyway this was definetely like my first child, these characters took my soul and love into them.   
> So I hope you liked this AU, if so I’d love to hear about your opinions. Any criticism is appreciated too.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading, thank you so much for your time, that means the world, knowing that I’m not alone with my words. I write and read by myself all the time, so this was different yet special.
> 
> Thank you Brooke, thank you Vanessa. I’ll cherish this fiction anytime I get back.
> 
> XOXO
> 
> alltherestisdrag (you can find me on Tumblr)


End file.
